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« Shifting Gears (Toben) | Main | Now THIS is Parenting (Toben) »

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heather Noce

i have been really struggling with where .god is for the las2 and a half years myself and I keep coming back to exactly the same thing I can't feel Him .Hedoesn't sm to be answering my prayers but, I have toteustthat .Hevis still thre and that He has a plan in al this even through all my complaining and ine- footed stomping If you Joann domplains to much... Trust me, I'm worse!

heather Noce

sorry, I type terribly now thatIcan only use my 'righthand. I meant to say, if you think Joann complains a lot, I'm much worse! And that las should be last

GWen

I've been concerned about you and your family. You seem in a very reflective mode. May I suggest that you need some down time, alone time, away time? A time, even if brief, where you are responsible only for yourself. A time to rest. A time to indulge yourself whether it is with sleep, food, activity, quiet, reading, prayer ...whatever. God will be there, too, and I believe your mind, body & spirit would benefit.

Tina Smith

love it!!! God's wisdom is speaking through you:) I've been that feet stomping girl in the last few years too:(

nancy

Still hoping you will write that book someday. Honest, heart wrenching words are needed and you always deliver, yet encourage and keep faith. Worth more than many sermons I've ever heard.

Jen P.

These are beautiful words. Probably so pretty to me because I GET IT. I get what you are saying. I have been mad and stomping before but those days are over. I am just tired but I'm leaning back on HIM. Toben, you have been through so much and I have been reading this blog since just before Joanne got hurt. I apologize for not sending one encouraging word. That was wrong. But I am reaching out today. I am right here to tell you that these words are wonderful and beautiful and many of us can relate to the feeling. Most of all God can relate and you are right, He will never leave your side. Just keep on keeping on. One day at a time. Some are good and some are bad and some are really really bad. Again, I get it. Prayers for whatever is heavy on your heart today. Prayers. Amen. Love, JP in IL

Lisa

I follow your blog from afar, commiserating with you on the hard days, rejoicing with you on the good reports, and sharing family life together as I serve in ministry and raise my kids too. While I am no mental health expert, I would hazzard a guess what you are feeling its very normal. Stages of greiving and coping have ups and downs, and mostly I sense you are just tired. It's very difficult to see someone you love live a life that's different than what you expected, and where you have a limited ability to change things. God does always have a plan, though, and you are not alone as you can see from your many blog followers. Can I encourage you to read a book that might bring you encouragement? It is a auto-biography of a man I really respect. Here's a link to his blogsite, but you can also find his books on Amazon. http://johnstumbo.com/purchase-information-2/ His life was humming along fine when a still undiagnosed illness nearly killed him, and left him totally dependent for many, many months, unable to even swallow. The first book tells his story, the 2nd captures all his blog posts during the journey (much like what you are doing). Just this week he was elected president of our denomination (Christian & Missionary Alliance). What a journey God has led him on and through! Yours and Joanne's obviously won't look the same as John and Joanna's, but you might find some encouragement in their story. We will be continuing to pray for the peace that passes understanding to surround you and your family, and for you to have strength that only Jesus gives as you lead your family and shepherd your team.

Carol

I have only been reading this blog since Joanne's stroke. So I don't know anything about your family prior to this. I do know that I always appreciate how honest you are. My husband passed away on March 22nd of this year. God and I aren't really on speaking terms..I'm sure he is speaking I'm just not ready to listen. I am listening to Him right now. I believe he spoke to me tonight through your blog. "Preach on, brother. The Truth is not always easy.

Angie

Thanks, Toben.

Cheryl Veenstra

I 'get' what you are saying too. I'm also in a dark night of the soul as I process 15 tough years of serious medical issues in our family...and now the consequences of those years. As always, thank you for your honesty.

Jennifer "InfertilityMom" Saake

Amen!

Sharon

Toben,

Thank you for this post. Especially for sharing what Jonathan said to you. I needed to hear it.

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