Back to School (Toben)

Both Audrey and Emma returned to school this week to very mixed results.

Emma is doing great! She jumped right in and is enjoying her classes and has already made two friends. One of the girls she has gotten to know is the daughter of Joanne's best friend from ninth grade. What a small world deal that is! Also, based on some testing and on her transcripts Emma has been placed in advanced Math and English. It'll be so good for her to be challenged. I think she spent a little time coasting at Denver Christian because she is such a smart kid with a solid work ethic. So far everything looks good for Emma in terms of her integration and success at her new middle school. She even mastered getting her locker open which was a real concern for her.

Audrey is a little bit miserable. Granted, she has only had one day of school, but she "hates" it. It needs to be said that Audrey has "hated" every school she has attended so this is nothing new. I am very hopeful that she will make a friend or two. I think that would really change the picture for her. She had her best friend from Creek come down to the Springs last weekend which was a good deal, but it turns out that that friend is going to move to Tennessee so Audrey is bummed about that.

I just hurt for Audrey because she has a hard life. I think some kids that act like Audrey need a good smack in the head, but when I look at Audrey's reality and it is pretty tough. She has lost a connection with her mom in a lot of ways, she had to move house, move schools, lose touch with friends. And she is a 14 year old girl, which I am convinced has to be the most difficult thing to be. For whatever reason, I feel an enormous amount of compassion and empathy toward her. I feel like if just one thing could go really right for her it would begin to change everything. 

I tried to brighten her day this past weekend by taking her to get her eyebrow pierced. She has wanted a new piercing for a long time and we worked together to find the best tattoo shop in town and on Saturday we went in and got it done. The guy who does their piercing is a real pro. She has had a number of piercing from a guy in Denver who we really liked but this guy down her is every bit as good in my estimation. The piercing looks so good on her. Now she is trying to figure out what she wants done next--which I have told her will be a long ways off! She even has plan for her first tattoo; full back angel wings! I have tried to explain to her how long and how many sittings it'll take to get that done but she is determined. Of course she won't get a tattoo until after she turns 18 and I will get a vote on what she gets and who does the work. 

Joanne is hanging in there. As we come up on the second anniversary of her stroke I think she is struggling because after all this time she still faces a lot of challenges that she thought would be behind her. I try to boost her spirits. For example, she loves the carrot cake at the neighborhood deli so today she will have that for lunch. It's nutritious because it has carrots, right? She is still spending a lot of time reading each day, and since my folks have TV she has enjoyed watching "What not to Wear" on TLC. Her friend Kristin is coming to take her out for coffee on Friday which will be a great treat. But even much more so than Audrey, Joanne has a tough go of it. She is in constant pain and has so much trouble getting around. Wish I could fix it for her! 

Prayer Requests:

1. Praise for Emma's experience at school!!!

2. Please pray that Audrey would make a friend or two. That could be a game changer for her. And is you could also just pray that a good thing would happen for her that would be great.

3. Please pray for peace for Joanne. Her daily life is a struggle and she gets so down about it. Pray for a boost in her spirits.

Toben

Comments

[Maribeth]

I am praying for your girls, but also for you! You never ask for prayers for yourself, but Toben, you are holding it all together and I shall pray for God's grace to be with you.

[Gwen]

Find me a 14-year-old girl who doesn't need a smack sometimes! JK -- sort of:) And, no question, Audrey, has coped with things that one her age is not "supposed" to have to deal with. You sound like you are very sensitive to all your girls and their needs.

[Linda E.]

I am praying for all of your prayer requests.
I must say, I can tell from your posts, you are an AMAZING husband and WONDERFULLLL father! All 3 of your girls are soo lucky to have you!! I hope your pat yourself on the back some and treat yourself too.

Many blessings to you all!

[Marla Taviano]

Praying for sweet Audrey and her mama!! Love you all!

[Karene]

My heart goes out to all your girls. They, and you, are in my prayers!

[Dona Haggerty]

Toben...I am praying that you can continue to be strong and loving and sensitive to those women around you :) And as you continue to be sensitive with Audrey, remember that God knows all these things. HE has allowed this to happen and HE will use it in Audrey's life for HIS glory. We are a family with 7 kiddos...all grown with 4 married so far, ages 33 to 18, and 4 grandsons. I will not go into all of the details, but our life for the past 18 years has been, to put it mildly, TOUGH, sometimes it has seemed unbareable. The hardest part has been watching what our children have had to endure. At times, I would become very angry with God...not for myself...but for my kiddos. But you know what? God used every hard thing for good in their lives. All seven are wonderful, hardworking, upstanding, young men and women of God. So...I say all of this to encourage you! God is at work. Your 14 year old Audrey will one day be a beautiful, wonderful 18 year old year old young lady! You just keep being there for her...loving her and listening to her. But, I caution...don't be too easy on her. This is life...and life is hard! :) I continue to pray for you and yours!

[Karen Booker Schelhaas]

Praying, praying, praying.

[Child of God]

Lifting you all up and praying!
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[Jen]

Love that you have encouraged Audrey and taken and interest in things she's interested in. I don't know many parents who would take their child to get an eyebrow piercing! And to actually admit it looks good on them! Even if you'd rather she didn't get piercings and tattoos...you know they are important to her and you support her. That will take you both a very long way.