You guys (well, gals!) have totally come through for Toben--he's blown away by your responses. So,thank you!
He'd love some "guy comments" too...would you consider asking your husband/boyfriend/fiance/guy friend to answer too?
Thanks in advance!
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I know Neal and I have talked about this before. He had no idea he'd be expected to take over (for my mom and friends) as my late night sounding board!
Once a month (cough cough) I just need a safe place for an hour or two to just dump the stress load. After that I'll sleep it off and all is well in the morning! At first, he'd try hard to listen and then "help out" with "advice", only to make me mad, sad and angry. Poor guy.
Finally I told him I just needed to get stuff off my chest in a safe, warm, loving place.
I do this in prayer, but at times I also need a body to hold me when it's just gets to be too much sometimes. Since then, he's been great about just holding me, listening, and nothing else! What a guy.
It takes a real man to properly handle chick talk.
This might be different for each gal, but "what she expects in the conversation relationship" is usually important to discover... early.
I finally learned to tell him before we talk, to say that this is just vent time (meaning, don't answer my retorical questions) or this is time that I want your input (meaning, you'd better listen, have an opinion and answer my questions, please!).
Many guys are clueless in the art of conversation. And our girly relationship needs only make that all the more difficult to handle. It's hard to admit and get used to the fact that we just need to spell out exactly what we want. And get used to keep doing it. If he catches on, great. If not, you're still openly talking... and that's great too!
Hope that's some good fuel for ya!
God bless!
Posted by: Amanda | June 10, 2008 at 03:18 PM
My husband, Alex, says that he wishes he had known what he wanted to do professionally before we got engaged. Hope that helps!
Posted by: Rachel | June 10, 2008 at 03:43 PM