Toben has been out of town for the past few days, and things just don't feel right when he's not here. Sure, the girls and I watch old movies (The Music Man and Hello, Dolly!) and do some things we don't usually do (sleepovers in the big bed), but the day just doesn't feel quite right when Toben's gone.
He works from home quite a bit, and is around so much that I miss him a lot on those days when he's in the office all day long; so when he's gone days at a time I really, really miss him.
Before the girls were born, I didn't mind when Toben travelled so much. And he used to travel a ton--gone for two weeks, home a week, gone for another week or two, home a week, and so on. I'd watch movies all weekend, or read stacks of books, or go stay with my parents, or go see movies with my girlfriends. I guess I enjoyed the chance to be "single" here and there (something I never really experienced since we got married when I was 19). But being a single mom is hard--our family just isn't complete without him around.
I love this man.
We've been through it and there was a year or two just recently when I wasn't sure we'd make it; our daily life was filled with pain and silence and sorrow and bitterness and loneliness and I couldn't imagine a future filled with more of the same. By God's grace alone we made it through and now that we've come out the other side, I can't imagine life without him.
Here's the two of us at the lake last summer...
P.S. It's Sarah's birthday today...happy birthday, my friend!